I really need serious advice.?
Okay, lately I've been falling apart. Every day I feel more numb and more hopeless and it scares me. I have no idea what to do. I used to be so happy all the time, and then things went downhill. My friends all ditched me because unlike them, I wasn't pretty or popular enough. It's ruined their image to be seen with me. After that, everyone started having something against me. They'd try kicking me down the stairs, people would tell me I'm so gross, or ugly. Then my friends sister made a facebook about me saying I'm a lesbian slut thats poor and will screw any guy for money even though I prefer girls. I tried to stay strong but I felt so awkward and out of place. I started embarrassing myself often in front of people. Now about a year later I have social anxiety, miss school because my panic attacks get really bad. I lost all self confidence. I feel like everyone hates me right away. I stopped trusting people. And even though I know my family loves and cares about me I have never felt so alone. My dad is barely around and my mom is with her new boyfriend. I am in therapy for the social anxiety but I hate telling people my emotions face to face. I'm sick of being judged and hated. Sometimes I just wish I could just go to sleep and never wake up so I won't have to face all the stuff that I can't take. I'm in 10th grade now, and I've been taking people's judgments and insults since like 4th grade. I've tried getting my emotions out through poetry, and story writing. Even music. But it doesn't help much anymore. Some days I feel okay. But more and more often I feel like I'm stuck all alone in a world that I don't belong in. I don't know anybody who I can relate to. I do have a few friends now and I know I bring them down. I don't have much of a sense of humor anymore and I barely talk to anyone, I don't think they want me around anymore. All my friends have boyfriends and I've always been single and they tell me all the time what I should do to improve myself. But not for the better. I am like really ethical and they aren't and they want me to change my beliefs because if I don't I'll always be single. anyway, Like I said, I'm so scared that I'll get to that point where I'm never happy and just give up the will to stay strong. I need advice.
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The hell with those what i call "chicken heads." your in 10th how awesome 2 years you graduate you should really think of what you want to do with your own life. Put that finger in the air and say the f with everyone w/out having to actually do it. Find out what makes you "enjoy" your life and makes you happy. Personal experiance i went through it all every little bit of it. My parents divorced when i was 5 they hate each other to this day. My friends spreaded rumors about me and destroyed every relationship that i ever had...i walked away with a smile on my face and i did it with alot of grace...you have to tell yourself everyday I'm Better than this. Now im 24 years old..I'v changed myself my attidude and everything around to better please me and make me happy.Theres only one person in your life that will ever make you happy and thats you. Hope you understand
First off ::hugs:::
Sounds like you are going through a lot, its a shame that ppl use the internet that way...to ridicule pple.
I would report it to facebook, im sure they would consider taking that down.
Additionally, you need to remember, highschool and middle school are super concentrated aspects of social life.
You will find out that once you go to college people aren't as judgemental.
You need to find some good friends, whether that be joining a sports team, joining an art club or something that you truely enjoy doing with your spare time. Good friends will stick up for you, plus you won't feel alone. Good freinds will keep you grounded.
Good luck!
Calm down its the people. Just think about this... You are going to finish high school in two years, don't get in touch with your friends, because from what you're telling me they don't sound like friends at all. For now, just go with the flow don't bring yourself down.
In 2 years it will be over and you will meet new people. There are Almost 7 billion people in this world and only about 10 (more or less doesn't matter, they are 2 digits) don't like you.
7 billion is 7,000,000,000
Now that is allot, trust me this will all end and you will have new and better friends in time who like you for who you are,
Think About it, eternal sleep is boring as hell.
A) Why dont you ******* print this and give it to your therapist cause nobody online is going to do anything about it. B) If you really have been suffering this since the 4th grade why has it taken you until the 10th to really get help for it? C) If this is truly your problem then know your not alone. But if your faking your a pretty ****** up person. thats all i can say.
Friends... Friends don't do things like that. Those are just mean people that you know. Do what they did to you and ditch them. Alright, you state you're staying strong which is GREAT. :) So know you have to learn how to become mentally strong. Whatever anybody says to you about looks or whatever, just let it go. I know that is one of the most hardest things to people but WHO ARE THEY to judge you. I wanted to suggest writing but you said you tried it. Actually you said you tried story writing... Maybe you should write about yourself. Just try and write about yourself and a 'how to overcome' type thing. And last thing, I think the last thing you are is hopeless because you're still asking for advice. Your trust IS still there. You take care. Stay strong you soldier you :)
First of all i would tell your parents that this therapist is not helping you and explain how you feel you need to see a Dr. that can prescribe medicine for depression and anxiety sometimes a therapist is not enough.Try giving yourself a makeover not a trashy one but one that makes you feel pretty.Confidence can do wonders for you and you will be treated better if you felt better because you will be friendlier and no one wants to approach a sad person.
Numb is a terrible feeling...I know it all too well, and I hate it more than anything.
I love writing and poetry and music as well; those are just a few of my favorite things, but definitely one of the best.
Sad to say, if you posted on here, that means you feel like you have no one to turn to...And I hate seeing that, because I have felt that way a lot.
If you are like me (because it seems like you are), you are worried about bringing your friends down because maybe they tell you their problems all the time; they confide in you. It's time for you to confide in them. I know it can be hard; you really don't want to be a burden. But if you feel like you just want to fall asleep until it's all over, you -need- to talk to them. Just talk to one, or even alternate on what you decide to tell them so you can feel like you're not overloading them.
Talk to your mom. She might have a boyfriend, but you are her daughter, and when it comes down to it...Chicks before *****, especially with mothers. If that therapy isn't working, tell her. Sit her down and let her know how you feel. If you were gone, she would hurt inside, wondering what she did wrong.
High School, while it can be fun, is the hardest time in our lives, and you're stuck in the middle of it. If I went through what you are now, I honestly don't think I would survive. You're strong, and I am proud of you for that.
When you're feeling down, look in the mirror, and just smile. Point out at least one good thing about yourself. Maybe you think your eyes look pretty, or maybe you did your makeup exceptionally well that day. Just point something out, -anything-. Maybe it can even be on your character. Also, find something that you're thankful for. Sometimes we can just feel better knowing that we at least have something...Just to have something to smile about. (I'm not saying you're ungrateful...Not in the least.)
Most importantly, make sure you're getting enough sleep. Go to bed early. If you have homework, wake up early and get it done. But if you went to bed at midnight and slept for eight hours, you would still feel like you only slept two. But somewhere between eight and ten is a good time for bed.
Eat "happy food"...Fruit, vegetables. Make sure you're getting everything all the nutrition you need. A healthy body is a *HAPPY* body, and that's what we're going for.
I'm not sure whether or not you believe in God, but reading the Bible in the morning can also help, especially Psalms. If you can find the time, go to the chapter that corresponds with the day of the month, and then read every 30th chapter after that. (If you get to 119, spread that one out. It's quite long.) Pray to Him; tell Him how you feel. I know it might seem weird talking to something invisible, but sometimes it helps, especially if you believe. And if you're having problems with your faith, just remember: "God, I believe. Help my unbelief."
If you ever need a friend, hit me up. Going through this is *never* fun, and I would never wish anyone to go through this alone.
Remember, people care, so don't ever give up, even if you feel like you're completely alone and unwanted.
Godbless.
What you should do is get professionals to help you get a makeover a new wardrobe and tips on how to get out of your comfort zone either that or be an emo person I dunno but you feel that way because you're judging yourself harshly ,you need to STOP caring bout how others feel bout you and start thinking in an optimist way of life enjoy it live life . CHANGE HOW YOU ARE FOR YOUR OWN GOOD BEFORE YOU DO SOMETHING STUPID.
Panic disorder with social phobia is one manifestation of your experience. You sound like you have a lot of symptoms of depression as well. If you are not on a medicine for your panic disorder, you might want to think about going for a medication evaluation. The medicines people use for anxiety disorders such as panic often times are also used for depression. If you haven't told your therapist about all of this as you have worded it here, you need to. S/he needs to know your depressive symptoms in addition to your anxiety symptoms and the history behind all of this in order to most effectively help you. Such is also true for a medication evaluation. Isolation and panic disorder are like a chicken and egg story. Which comes first?
You are totally right on in standing up for your morals. You don't need to give guys your body in order to be valuable enough to date. If that's what's required for these guys, they're not worth dating. If they have a choice between sex and you, and they don't choose you, their first priority is obvious. If your "friends" compromise or choose a lack of morals to get boyfriends, then is it boyfriends they are really getting, or is it guys that use them? Is it really a boyfriend that's giving himself as a whole person, or is it just his body? I feel sorry for them in a way. They don't have boyfriends; they have bodies that they delude themselves into believing are boyfriends. After a series of them, your "friends" will start complaining that men are perverted pigs (and most are) and blame the men for ending up lonely after a string of "partners." You won't have that disturbance.
What do you mean you started embarrassing yourself? Did you do something that drew you to become embarrassed after the fact, or did you just feel embarrassed because of what was already going on? Regardless, you definitely need to seek help for your (severe) depressive symptoms. You are incredibly isolated. I wonder if you'd benefit from a program for kids with emotional issues. I don't know what's available in your area, but in addition to your therapist, you need to tell the school counselor or school psychologist what is going on, and tell the counselor/psychologist you want an evaluation to determine what kind of placement would be best for you. There are programs that integrate therapy into school and have lots of support, great staff to student ratios. They have all kinds of other teens just like you. In the interim, look into such programs yourself - research it here on the internet. What kinds of alternative programs are available in your area? What kind of those schools serve students your age?
I really do not like the term "mental illness." It doesn't come out of nowhere - it's a response to things. In any event, there is a child and adolescent action center on the NAMI website. This website has been incredibly helpful for every client of mine (minor or adult) who has seen it and they come back with nothing but thank yous and how wonderful it's been, how much helpful information (and thus understanding of what's happening) and support they now have. Such is the case even for my extended family. The website has all kinds of links and information. You can browse to find what you want to know, but I encourage you to at least look at it. You may find information you might want to share with your parents and/or school counselor/psychologist. Sure, they're all busy, but you are important and if your parents knew half of what was going on with you, they'd respond (if they had any sense of responsibility - some parents don't, but you don't know until you try). If you tell them you're missing school because of your issues, they will likely at least be concerned enough to talk to you about it.
http://www.nami.org/template.cfm?section=child_and...