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You need to get some counseling now. Don't put it off. You need to get rid of these thoughts. They are not helping you at all. You've formed a compulsion to think of them and that's what certain counseling techniques can stop.

What you have voung Lady is nothing more than an over imaginative mind that you allow to have the capability to over think.

It's almost like an over wealming and over bearing thought you get, sort of "what if......."

Alot of People have this... It usually starts with a minor Situation, like you are on an Underground/mentro Train and think "what if I just scream bananas as loud as I can! what would happen", this may then Progress onto things like in a Job interview you would think "what would happen if I just threw this steaming Cup of coffee into your face" and the Progression will carry on until you are at your stage nowand may have also (or do still) involve suicidal thoughts about how easy it would be to just kill yourself as well as other people. But, this is where it Ends and in a couple of months you will stop having These overwealming silly thoughts in your head.

It is not a sign of mental illness by anymeans, think of it as just a Phase that is disturbing you.

What I would suggest is just to let the thoughts run their course. Coffee has been proven to make People feel happy and optomistic as well as productive... maybe try drinking a strong Cup of coffee a day and being productive.

Hi there. I used to work as a receptionist in the psychiatric out-patients. It is that which you need to get in contact with, if not becoming an in-patient for a while. To be admitted or get registered to see a consultant you do NOT need to go and see your GP. All you need do is simply go to the A and E department asn explain things to them.

I myself have had to do that, and it is NOT anything to be ashamed of! If you get to a situation where you need help NOW then you could always ring the police. Maybe not as an emergency (unless you felt it was) but the local number, which if you do not have it could be found on the net. They will be more than willing to HELP by taking you to the hospital. Either way - A and E or calling police - you are more than likely to be a "self admitted" patient. If you have self admitted then you can also self-discharge, although there are sometimes when they do not allow it.

I hope that this helps a bit. You take care.

Richard

Jesus loves you and I am praying for you. Ask Jesus to help you and He will. If you feel like you might actually follow through with the thoughts then please see a doctor. Best Wishes.

Talk to a professional.