Okay, so I've always had problems with my mom. We'll have a few good days and then we'll have a horrible week where we don't stop fighting and we just can't be around each other. She's always been kind of emotionally, verbally, and physically abusive and recently it's gotten so bad that I've actually considered suicide more than once. Now my brothers are suddenly against me and they act like they don't like me. I have three brothers and before recently we all got along so well and always played together and did everything together and could talk about anything together. Now two of my brothers never want to be around me and just, well, hate me it seems like. Last night I overheard my brothers and my mom talking about how "fake" I am and how I'm only "invited to play games because she's in the family" and "if she wasn't in the family we'd never invite her" because I'm "fake" and they "hate being around" me. I honestly didn't do **** to them, so I don't know what's wrong. Now I'm depressed again and I just can't stop thinking about killing myself and just ending the pain. What should I do? What can I do? Help! P.S. My mom won't take me to therapy or anything, so that's really out of the question and no one knows about the abuse because I've always thought that it was my fault and I've felt embarrassed by it.

By the way, I was diagnosed with depression a year and a half ago and it runs in my family. Also, things got a lot worse after I watched my uncle (and best friend) slowly and painfully die from horrible melanoma six months ago. So I'm not being an "over dramatic, bratty little girl". Thanks.