Should my husband and I court each other?
It seems we never got a chance to fall in love with eachother. We just got married just to get married. We have been together for over five years now and have two children. We both have the same tastes in music, activities, and enjoy the same things. I went to chemistry and other sites to see if there was anyone other than my husband that I was compatible with and no one came up. Absolutely no one. So should we try to court eachother since we have been together for so long and never really got a chance to just court eachother first? It seems weird, but he prayed for a wife for 22 years and I wanted a family so we made an arrangement, but it seems we are well matched, but something seems missing like we skipped a step so should we court eachother?
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My boyfriend and I are going through the same thing! We lived far away and due to circumstances committed to one another. We never had too much of a courting phase either...
Communication is key and it sounds like you and your husband have talked about it, which is important. My boyfriend and I plan dates that mimic a courting stage. For example, we planned a "dinner & a movie" night. We also planned a "1st date" night. We've also gone to a few small and interesting events in our town...like the fair, an art show, etc.
I think little things like that keeps the relaitonship interesting (at any stage). I bet it would be difficult with kids but with good planning (set a date, hire a babysitter, etc.), I bet the anticipation and buildup of excitement will make the date that much more enjoyable!
Since it is impossible to "go back" and change things, I think it's healthier to incorporate aspects that you miss or want from a courting stage into your real life.
I hope this helps. Good Luck! I wish you and your husband the best!
Yes, you should court each other. You'll probably find a side of each other that you didn't know about before. Flirt, go out to dinner, have fun! However, you need to be careful about the type of behavior you show in front of your kids. Affection is fine, but don't do anything inappropriate, like making out.
Another reason that courting is good, is because when the parents are happy and having fun, the family atmosphere is happy and fun. I hope I helped!
Time for you two to romance each other. Make a game of it, take turns planning secret things that are meant to be romantic and focus on the two of you.
I was a dad at 16. I did not get to court anyone, the girl and I were classmates and nothing more, got stoned one night studying, had sex for 6 hours and wound up married for 8 years. I had to work full time to support them and myself, and did not stop raising kids for thrity years. I understand what you mean.
Throw spice into what you have. It will only make the soup better, and maybe satisfy the craving...
LUCK!
Only love will keep you together.If your in it for any other reason it will not last.Sad, but true Viv.I'm not telling you to get a divorce,but maybe you should consider your options before it's too late.You arranged the marriage of convience because it worked for both of you,but you left out the most important piece of the puzzle....LOVE.
But on a lighter note,dress up in your Viking outfit with nothing on under it of course, and capture and have your way with him (your husband).Vikings take what they want without asking for approval.That's what's so captivating/arousing about the idea of a female Viking warrior.
Wow, is it warm in here, or is it just me......
vivianna, Oh yes dear yes ! Please allow him to be the gentleman and open doors and hold the chair while you sit down. Take turns serving each other meals, just like you were giddy teenagers in love.I am only 47 but have been alone since 1985. So I dream of the old romantic ways. When the kids have gone to bed or are out,sit by candlelight and eat or dream while sipping your favorite wine or champagne. Fall "in" love all over again. May God bless your romance !
Sounds kinda sad inna way. Why not give it a chance and take some time to date each other once inna while and have some fun. Take the time to fall in love it's great and who better than with your husband sounds like a good guy and you both deserve the feeling of bein in love with each other. Have fun!!
As a counselor who believes Courting IS a great way to find passion and love... you may have found what you seem to have missed when you married. I have lots of thoughts to share... if you really want to make this happen. Best to you both! Dr Steve
I think that dating would be great. You guys should pick a night each week and get a babysitter and just go out and have a date night or something like that. You guys can just fall in love again. It will be time to yourselves to just enjoy eachother..
Most long term marriages are worked on and continually postulated that it will go on. Also, a fess-up night ever few months with each of you confessing things you did to each other that hurt each other is a good start. If you care for each other, it works out. If not, you have a tempest in a teapot.
If you feel like you really are compatible with him then why not. I think that would make things interesting and fun if you "court" each other. It sucks that y'all got married and weren't even in love, but it's never to late for love.
good luck =)