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Mother, thank you for giving the gift of life to me..
I hope in me, a part of you, you'll always see!!!.
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This isn't really a joke, but I heard these on the radio.
Moms teach us about the weather - "It looks like a tornado blew through your room!"
Moms teach us about logic - "If you fall off that swing and break your neck, don't come running to me!"
Moms teach us about the science of diffusion - "Shut your mouth and eat your dinner!"
Moms teach us about time travel - "If you say one more thing, I'll knock you into next week!"
*For this next one, I don't remember what the "Moms teach us about" thing is*
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out!"
I think there was one about contortionism, and I may be missing others as well. I'll post them if I think of them!
I'm as happy as can be coz the best mum in the world belongs to ME!