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Well, I have many years of experience in marriage, and when it comes to love making, I believe if you don't worry about if your spouse has reached her orgasm or not you have serious problems. It is very important in love making to not just please yourself, but work at returning the favor. How sad would it be if as the women, you were to reach your orgasm, and then roll over and say I love you, not even warring about if your husband had a orgasm. They call it love making for a reason, and if you love someone make them feel it.

Well he should know by now.

I remember this one girl I dated - geez sex was like being at the rodeo - you climbed on and hoped to god you lasted 8 seconds before she bucked you off.

WIth all the yelling and gyrations and biting I would *think* she was done - start to slow down/change positions/whatever - and she would holler "not yet! i haven't come!" and I'm thinking wow what happens when you do - does a pachinko machine open up and a disco ball drop from the ceiling and a midget run out and clamp a car battery to my nuts?

My point is - your 'job' is to make sure he knows you have had an orgasm.

His 'job' should be working very hard (and enjoying every second of it) to ensure you have what 4? 5? 7? orgasms to his one. And that you get most of yours first.

If you're not telling him that's easy to fix. If he isn't asking and not even concerned whether you *do* or not - that is also easy to fix albeit a different problem - he is selfish and needs to be trained to think of others first in that department.

When I say 'he' and 'you' of course I mean your friend and her man, of course. :-D

If we care and we cannot tell whether you did or not it is only a good thing that we would want you to be satisfied. But the fact of whether or not a man is good in bed is not representative of whether or not you had the big O. How he is doing in that department? I would think that if he wasn't doing the things you enjoy you would say something, I mean everywhere else in life women seem to be outspoken about things right or wrong. I cannot see the difference in the bedroom unless it is because there is no audience.

Kitty answered correctly.....And for any women who fakes an orgasm the only person she is hurting is herself. But for some men its a question of confidence some have to little (there afraid to ask) some have to much and think there mister stud and it's the women's fault. Then there are just the ones who are clueless probably do to lack of experience. It always amazes me that people don't understand what sex truly represents..........

If the sex involves 2 people, so does the conversation...

Is not only up to a husband to please but to a wife to say whether she is pleased or not.

It shouldn't be a guessing game, specially past the dating...

He could be too confident or have the misconception that women "always orgasm"... It would be up to the wife to clear that one up!

Here is the way I see it: If you fake, lie or don't speak up then you can't complain if you are not pleased...

I don't know about you, but I hate being asked. To me, for a man to insist or expect that I have an "O" every time we do it is just obnoxious. Like it makes him less of a man if I don't feel like it one day? A skillful lover will pick up on body language and non-verbal cues; this is what separates a "pro" from an amateur. In a lover, I value flexibility, confidence and sensitivity; if he listens and pays attention, he will never need to ask.

Sounds selfish to me. I like to think I am doing a good job, so I feel it's important to know if she is being satisfied. If not, then what's the point (unless for selfish reasons).

The more I know I am pleasing her, the more turned on I become.

A husband should know if his wife has reached the point of climex. It is not hard, all he has to do is listen.

If he get his and she doesn't get hers, he's just selfish.

Sex in marriage should be pleasurable.

I can't ask my wife about it. She would get upset at me. It's happened before. She would think I'm comparing her to other w%@men. It's not that I'm selfish. I would love to see that she is satisfied. She's just never been interested in getting any of that from me She didn't want me to touch her there for the longest time. Thought it was dirty. So as the years went on I sorta fell into despair about it. Now, I'm just dealing with it.

I'm not selfish. I've tried. Can't change somebody else.

Weird question. What type of marriage is it that she couldn't tell him. If mamma's not happy she going to want it less. He'll go elsewhere and so will she. Why couldn't a grown up lady tell her husband what she needs and wants. Does he have to ask. Is she faking. People are so hung up If you are close enough to have their genitals try talking TOO!