Why is my Mom so controlling when it comes to me going back to an ex I want back?
Ok so Im going to make this as fast as possible...please bare with me.
Ok like 2 years ago I broke up with my boyfriend because he hit me while he was drunk.
It was a one time thing. He also had sex with my best friend but that was BECAUSE I LET HIM. We were having a threesome and I wanted it to happen. Later I regreted it because I got jealous and wanted it to stop but they kept going at it that night. Now you might think this is the worse boyfriend in the world but not to me. To this day I miss him like crazy and sometimes I even want him back. My Mother said if I get back with him she will kick me out. And ever since then she has been too overbearing, nagging, controlling , domineering Mother who just seems to get worse and worse everyday. She is like this about EVERYTHING not just about my ex. Im so tired of her ways ! Now after 2 years of being broken up with this guy I dont know if I actually broke up with him for what he did to me, or because my Mom made me do it !
I want to be able to make my own decisions not someone make them for me.
My question is, how do I know if I broke up with him because I knew it was the right thing to do since he hit me and had sex with my friend (even though I let him do it) or it was my Mom's controlling ways that influenced me? Im sooo confused please help. I feel trapped and suffocated by her. With him I never felt that way. Sometimes I just want to run away with this guy and never look back just to get away from her. I think I was better off with him . I REALLY DO FEEL THIS WAY sometimes sorry.
Answers & Comments
Verified answer
Your mother's right and you're wrong. HE HIT YOU! I don't care if it's once or a million times. For that you should stay away from him FOREVER. Get yourself some therapy because you obviously need it if you want to get back with a drunken abuser.
First of all, you are living under your mothers' roof... She who pays the bills, ie, food, electricity, etc.. makes the rules. if you don't like it. LEAVE!
Although, I do agree with your mother. You are setting yourself up for abuse. But, it seems that you don't love yourself enough, care whether you are kicked to the curve like a dog. I am really sorry that this is the case. No, sane person would share her love/boyfriend with another. Yes, you were controlled by your boyfriend.
Take responsibility for yourself.. your mother did NOT make you break up with your boyfriend. It was either getting laid or having a roof over your head. You are obviously smart and realized that having a roof was more important. Your mother is not getting worse.. it is quite the opposite. You know its wrong or it is against your way of thinking. Continue thinking smart, stay where you are at. Lose your loser boyfriend and get an education. You are a smart girl. Good luck
Your mother is afraid you'll get hurt again, so she's trying to control you. Unfortunately, she can't live your life. You have to live it yourself, whether or not you make the right decisions. It's probably time for you to venture out and get your own place. Most likely, you broke up with the guy because of your mother's influence. Had she not been in the picture, things might have been different. Think about getting your own place.
Have good talk with mom and with your es and see how he treats your mom. At my age 50 my mom still knows what is going on and she is nearly 70.
you have a open mind and should go back to him,,never be a mommys girl,,she aint gonna please you at night