I can't afford instrumentals what should I do!?

I loved rapping since I was 9 becaused it made me feel awesome. I'm 17 now, I have 148 lryics/poems in my iphone but the problem is I'm broke...I can't afford 20 dollar beats online I can't even afford a mic. All I got is my phone & I'm trying so hard to look for jobs & I'm selling my stuff even tho I don't have much to sell cause I'm too poor. I'm also beting for money. I can't ask my parents for help cause they're poor & they don't really support me instead they just put me down & beat me trust me my parents are the last people I would ask for help. I found a produce who's willing to make beats for me but I have no job. I made so many lryics/poems that now I'm dealing with writers block but I just don't know what to do its like I was born not to make it

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